ABSTRACT
This paper delves into the pervasive issue of domestic violence against men within the context of Indian society. It begins by exploring the deeply ingrained socio-cultural expectations of masculinity that discourage male emotional expression and perpetuate gender stereotypes. The analysis extends to the failures of legislation, which primarily focus on safeguarding the interests of women, leaving men vulnerable to abuse and discrimination. Through a critical examination of laws such as the Dowry Prohibition Act and the Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, the paper highlights the gender-specific bias that overlooks the suffering of men. The discussion underscores the psychological toll of domestic violence on men, exacerbated by societal ridicule and legal inadequacies. The paper concludes with a call to action for greater recognition and support for male victims of domestic violence, particularly in the context of Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month. By amplifying their voices and challenging societal norms, India can move towards a more inclusive and equitable society where all victims are seen, heard, and supported.
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INTRODUCTION
“Be a man! Men don’t cry!” This saying, deeply ingrained in Indian society, reflects the long-standing socio-cultural expectation that men must be strong and stoic. This notion of manhood, which has been perpetuated for ages, simultaneously upholds the belief that women are the weaker sex. Such ideas are emblematic of the patriarchal framework within Indian society.
Patriarchy, as defined by the European Institute for Gender Equality, refers to a “social system of masculine domination over women.” Similarly, the Cambridge Dictionary describes patriarchy as “a society in which the oldest male is the leader of the family, or a society controlled by men in which they use their power to their own advantage.” This patriarchal system creates significant barriers to the effective implementation of laws and provisions designed to promote gender equality in India.
BACKGROUND
In 2014, VOGUE India released a powerful advertisement with the tagline “Boys don’t cry,” depicting a poignant narrative that follows a boy from birth to adulthood. The advertisement begins with a father attempting to soothe his crying newborn by repeatedly saying, “Boys don’t cry.” This phrase echoes throughout the boy’s life: from being scolded by his mother after a bath, to being reassured at school, to being comforted after hurting his elbow, to facing pressure from his father to swim, to enduring a nurse’s injection, to coping with pain on the football field, to managing the joy of winning a trophy, and finally, to dealing with the heartbreak of a breakup.
As the boy transitions into adulthood, the expectation that “Boys don’t cry” seems to have a deep impact. The advertisement culminates with a grown man whose eyes reveal not the redness of tears, but the redness of anger. In a shocking scene, he grabs his wife’s hand, twists it, and throws her to the floor, suggesting severe physical assault. The screen then displays the powerful message: “We have taught our boys not to cry since childhood… It’s time we teach them not to make girls cry. Start with the boys.”
At first glance, the advertisement appears to challenge the societal norm that represses male emotional expression, suggesting that crying is a natural and acceptable response for everyone, regardless of gender. However, it ultimately shifts focus, placing the blame on men and urging them to cease violence against women. This conclusion might leave viewers with mixed feelings, as it addresses an important issue but also risks perpetuating a narrative that assigns sole responsibility for violence to boys and men.
The theme “Boys Don’t Cry” resonates beyond this advertisement. It is also the title of a novel by Malorie Blackman, a highly acclaimed British author known for her thought-provoking young adult fiction. Published in 2010, Boys Don’t Cry explores complex issues of identity, love, and societal expectations. Through its powerful exploration of masculinity and the struggles faced by young men, Blackman’s novel provides a nuanced perspective on the emotional and societal pressures that shape male behavior.
MALE VIOLENCE
From ancient times until the late 1960s, women faced harsh conditions and were often treated as inferior to men. In ancient India, texts like epics and Puranas portrayed women as akin to property, with strict societal rules dictating their lives. According to Manu, a woman’s dependence shifted from her father in childhood to her husband in youth, and finally to her sons after her husband’s death. Essentially, women were viewed more as objects than individuals with their own rights.
However, in recent times, India has made significant strides in empowering women through legislation. Laws now provide women with greater freedoms and protections. For instance, reserved seats and entire coaches in public transportation ensure women’s safety and security. Yet, despite these advancements, traditional gender roles persist, contributing to social issues like domestic violence, sexual harassment, and dowry demands. Even more alarming are practices like female infanticide and feticide, highlighting deep-seated biases against women.
In response to these challenges, various laws have been enacted to address gender-based crimes. However, a troubling misconception has emerged: that only women can be victims of men’s actions. This belief has led legislators to focus primarily on women’s rights, neglecting the plight of men who also suffer from abuse and discrimination. Additionally, some individuals misuse women’s protection laws to seek revenge or personal gain, victimizing innocent men and their families.
It’s crucial to recognize that offenses like rape, sexual harassment, and domestic violence are not exclusive to any gender. Both men and women can be victims or perpetrators. However, in India, there’s a prevailing assumption that only women are victims, overlooking the experiences of men who face similar hardships.
While progress has been made in advancing women’s rights, it’s essential to ensure equal protection and support for men as well. By acknowledging the complexities of gender-based violence and addressing the needs of all individuals, India can truly strive towards a more just and equitable society for everyone.
FAILURE OF LEGISLATIONS
Several laws, such as The Immoral Traffic (Prevention) Act of 1956, The Dowry Prohibition Act of 1961 (updated in 1986), and others, primarily focus on safeguarding the interests of women. Unfortunately, due to the overwhelming number of offenses against women, there’s an assumption that only women can be victims, not men. These laws are gender-specific, categorizing victims and perpetrators based solely on gender. According to them, only women can be victims, and only men can be perpetrators. This oversight neglects the fact that men can also fall victim to such offenses.
In the pursuit of championing women’s rights, the rights of men have been overlooked. This bias stems from societal stereotypes surrounding masculinity and the patriarchal nature of our society. For example, the Indian Penal Code of 1860 defines rape as a crime committed by a man against a woman. This narrow definition fails to acknowledge that men can also be victims of sexual violence and other forms of abuse.
We must recognize and address the vulnerabilities faced by men. By challenging gender stereotypes and promoting equality under the law, we can create a more just and inclusive society for all.
Consider the Dowry Prohibition Act, a watershed moment in India’s legal history aimed at eradicating the scourge of dowry. While its intentions were noble, its implementation has sometimes veered into murky waters, leaving men vulnerable to false accusations and legal entanglements. The presumption of guilt, coupled with societal expectations of male responsibility, creates a labyrinth of injustice for those wrongly accused.
Similarly, the Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, while a crucial step in combating violence within households, often overlooks the plight of men who endure abuse in silence. Defined as a law to protect “women” from domestic violence, its narrow focus fails to recognize the suffering of men trapped in abusive relationships, their cries for help drowned out by societal expectations and gender stereotypes.
Rape laws, too, reflect a gender-specific bias, with only women recognized as victims under Indian law. This narrow definition not only perpetuates harmful stereotypes but also denies justice to male survivors of sexual violence, relegating their trauma to the shadows of societal ignorance and legal neglect.
Yet, beyond the confines of legislation and societal norms lies a human story, one of pain, suffering, and resilience. Men, too, bear the scars of violence, whether physical, emotional, or psychological. Behind closed doors, in the sanctity of their homes, they endure the same agony as their female counterparts, their suffering hidden beneath a veneer of masculine stoicism.
As we mark Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month, it is imperative that we shatter the silence and acknowledge the reality of men as victims of violence. By amplifying their voices, advocating for their rights, and challenging societal norms, we can create a more inclusive, empathetic society where all victims are seen, heard, and supported on their journey to healing. Only then can we truly unveil the veil and usher in an era of true gender equality and justice for all.
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
The literal meaning of the “Domestic Violence” means any violent or aggressive behavior of any person within the home as the word “domestic” dictionary meaning is relating to a running of a home or to family relation. Many men endure abusive relationships for various reasons. Some hold onto hope that things will improve, while others fear losing their social standing or the love of their family. They might feel pressured to stay in the marriage, fearing blame if it falls apart. Often, abused men blame themselves and think they deserve the mistreatment they receive.
The emotional toll of domestic violence on men can be even greater than the physical harm. Despite being physically stronger, men can suffer deeply on a psychological and emotional level. Sadly, in Indian society, men who speak up about being raped are often ridiculed.
The psychological sufferings of men are greater than physical harm since men are stronger physically as compared to psychologically or emotionally. Indian society laughs on a man if he says that he has been raped. In the case of Narendra v. K. Meena (Civil appeal No. 3253 of 2008, decided on 2016), the Supreme Court of India had decided that the Coercion or forcing the husband to leave his parents dependant on his income amounts to cruelty on part of the wife, therefore it can be a strong ground for divorce under Hindu Law. Similarly,in the case of Raj Talreja v. Kavita Talreja (Civil Appeal No. 10719 of 2013), there were false allegations made by the wife against the husband. The court held that it amounted to mental cruelty and is a ground for divorce.
CONCLUSION
Domestic violence against men by their spouse and family members has become an important issue in today’s generation and became the form of domestic violence under the judiciary.
June is men’s mental health awareness month. The stats show that “Men are four times more likely to commit suicide making up nearly 80% of all suicides.” “40% of men have never spoken to anyone about their mental health”, “1 in 10 men experience depression or anxiety. And less than half receive treatment”,
FAQs
What is the focus of your paper?
This paper delves into the pervasive issue of domestic violence against men within Indian society. It explores the socio-cultural expectations of masculinity, failures in legislation, and the psychological toll of domestic violence on men.
Why is domestic violence against men an important topic to discuss?
Domestic violence against men is often overlooked or minimized in discussions about gender-based violence. By shedding light on this issue, we aim to raise awareness and advocate for greater support for male victims.
What are some examples of socio-cultural expectations of masculinity discussed in the paper?
The paper discusses societal norms that discourage male emotional expression and perpetuate gender stereotypes, such as the expectation that “boys don’t cry.”
How do failures in legislation contribute to the vulnerability of men to domestic violence?
The paper highlights how laws primarily focus on safeguarding the interests of women, leading to a gender-specific bias that overlooks the suffering of men. This leaves men vulnerable to abuse and discrimination.
Can you provide examples of laws discussed in the paper?
The paper examines laws such as the Dowry Prohibition Act and the Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, which are intended to address gender-based violence but often neglect the experiences of male victims.
What is the psychological toll of domestic violence on men?
The paper discusses how domestic violence can have a significant psychological impact on men, exacerbated by societal ridicule and legal inadequacies. This can include feelings of shame, guilt, and isolation.
How does the paper suggest addressing the issue of domestic violence against men?
The paper concludes with a call to action for greater recognition and support for male victims of domestic violence, particularly in the context of Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month. It emphasizes the importance of amplifying their voices and challenging societal norms to create a more inclusive and equitable society for all victims.
Happy Kushwah
The ICFAI Univrersity, Jaipur
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